"I have to text my dad to tell him to stop watching that show with Blaine. He's making him more anxious. It's gentle musical time, clearly. How does he not recognise the signs?" Kurt talked as he got into the passenger seat and fastened the seatbelt.
He was dressed in black leggings, a skin-tight, long-sleeved blue shirt and sneakers. Practice outfit. He had been at dance practice when this had started and here he was now. Red-rimmed eyes and still in crisis mode.
"Thanks for picking me up. Finn, please tell me you have deodorant? Even whatever macho axe bodyspray you have would be useful at this junction."
"Uhhh, I don't-- Oh. Wait." Finn undid his seatbelt and turned around so he could reach behind his seat and get his bag from the back. "I should have some in here, just look around and avoid the sandwich." It had been there for a while and he was too lazy to toss it but whenever he touched it, it was pretty gross.
Doing his seatbelt back up, he reversed from his spot and moved towards the gate, glad that Kurt had come because he had no idea what he was supposed to do.
"I knew the guy. One of the guys. It's crazy, he was on the football team. He seemed normal." He had no idea how to wrap his mind around that. Sure, he was a loser but he never wanted to take it out on others. "I'm glad no one died, it could have been worse."
"That's so weird." That Finn knew the guy, not that gross sandwich in his bag. Although that, yes, was also weird. Still, Kurt braved reaching past it and managed to put on the deodorant. Ah, yes. That was just what he wanted to smell like for a reunion with Blaine after months. Locker room.
"I mean, I kind of knew them both. But from the normal getting called names and being bullied stuff. I never talked to them." Normal, as Finn had said. "Do you know how Miss Beiste is doing?"
"Not too bad, I went to check in. Nothing major, it missed all the art-- thingies or something. She'll be back at work in a couple of weeks, if she wants to." Obviously, it wasn't going to be easy for anyone to return. The damage alone was something Finn had to imagine would ruin morale for a while. "I saw Will. Talked to him. We hugged... which is good cause, as I told you during our last bro jam sesh, he hated me."
Turns out nearly dying put Will in a forgiving mood.
"Will told me the kids in the choir room helped with the bleeding, especially Blaine and Sam. I'm so proud of them all." They survived, they kept each other safe and no one acted rash or stupid. "I hope they'll all go back to school soon or we'll have to just miss regionals. It is what it is, you know?"
"I don't know if I could have ever gone back there. After something like this." Kurt looked out the window, swallowing as he tried to imagine it. "In the choir room. That's the one place that ever felt safe there. Even when I was terrified to go to school."
He remembered it all too well. Maybe Blaine should go back to Dalton. Or maybe he was being a coward even thinking like that while Blaine needed him to be a hero. "I'm glad Mr Schuester and you hugged it out. I-- I've no idea what I'm doing. Why I'm even here."
It was just all he could think to do. All he had wanted was to hold Blaine and make sure he was safe.
"Cause you care and it's... it's cool, you know? Rachel wanted to come too, I think her and Santana have plans. It's the choir room. It's our safe place, man." And no matter what, Finn was going to go in there tomorrow and clean it up. Work out how to fix glass and make sure no blood was left anywhere. "No one should ever do that to our safe space."
It was the only place he felt happy, he couldn't let those assholes win.
"Besides, it's Blaine. I know if there was a shooting at NYADA or Yale, I'd run to the airport. You know?" Finn huffed out an awkward laugh and turned into the main road. "Doesn't matter if you're into each other or not or whatever. That's someone you loved. Still love."
"I'd worry for those shooters if they tried going after Quinn." Joking made it seem a bit less real. He knew he had messages from Santana and Rachel on his phone but he could not focus on them right now. Instead he held his phone and hoped that his dad was at least putting something less anxiety-inducing on for Blaine.
"I do still love Blaine. I'll always... I just can't be with him. It's not good for him." He had to be the mature one. He had to insist they were over. "I want to keep him safe."
"I don't judge. You always know what you're doing, little bro. You're the smart one." He trusted that Kurt knew what he was up to and was making the right choices. He knew people, he understood things - Finn could never think like he did. No chance. "I don't think he's moved on. He has a bunch of pictures of you in his locker and last week I think he made you in art class out of paper mache. I think. It was hard to be sure but either way, it was disturbing."
That's why Will had showed him and him, Emma and Bieste had stood there, trying to work out what it was and what to do. In the end - nothing. Creativity was free and creepy.
"I think it would happen again. I mean... He cheated and the reason why he cheated is not going anywhere." Not a reason that he thought Finn would grasp and not a reason he thought Blaine was ready to confront either. "And maybe I could take it. Being a jilted lover. It's a dramatic part. But Blaine... He shouldn't feel like he is awful."
It was so self-destructive. "Although I can say all that and when I'm there with him in person, especially after today? I've no idea how to handle it." He closed his eyes for a moment, then sighed. "Thank you for beating up Brody. I always felt he was homophobic, you know? Or maybe I just disliked him. Misogynist Ken doll."
"Yeah. That was so fun. I hated that jerk. Really hated that jerk. He was literally the worst. What a thing to do to Rachel? She doesn't deserve that. It's sneaky and it's... it's wrong. And weird." It didn't matter if Rachel would be with him or not, no matter what he wanted himself, but she couldn't be with that jerk. Only nice boys who didn't fuck every woman in the capital for illegal cash.
"Thanks for the pep talk last week. I got accepted into the teacher course. Me and Puck have our own room on campus." And Finn was so excited to get his degree and start his job. "It's really cool already."
"Also, I did research into it and he had to have been ridiculously discerning to be a straight male gigolo. Told you, it's homophobic." Which really was not the point, yet it still deserved to be said. Kurt shook his head and then turned to look at Finn, smiling for the first time in what felt like ages.
"Congratulations! I knew you'd get in. Now you have to promise to tell me in case you have any trouble, I don't want to have to end up coaching someone who is flunking while we should be preparing for Nationals again."
"It's all good. I'll tell you if anything comes up and you tell me if that Brody jerk comes sniffing around again. This time, I'll break his money-maker." He meant his face, not realising it kind of sounded like he'd snap his dick in half somehow.
"You should tell Burt we'll be back soon, I'll have to swap our cars around so he should leave his keys by the door." And hopefully while he did that, Kurt would have some time with Blaine. The two of them definitely needed it. "Maybe mom is home, she can put something calming on TV. Like... flower shows or something."
"Flower shows?" Kurt texted his dad and then stared at Finn and then, once Finn was done parking the car, he leaned over and hugged him. What a big, stupid idiot. "You are so... you."
Why had he never stopped being endeared by his idiocy? He pulled back, cleared his throat and undid his seatbelt. "How do I loo-- You know what? Don't answer that." He did a few quick vocal exercises and then got out of the car, walking straight-backed and purposeful to the house.
He knocked and then used his keys, walking inside. "Hello, hello."
"Hey, son." Burt hugged him quickly, already headed for the door. "I'll swap the cars around with Finn." Ever practical, he was on his way, leaving Kurt alone with Blaine.
"Hey. Did you tell your dad I was scared of the truck show? Cause we're watching, well, this--" He gestured at the TV, that was playing a gentle show about repainting a boat that had about as much thrill in it as Marley's love life. Blaine awkwardly got to his feet and looked at Kurt, losing his breath as he always did. It was easier to joke, to laugh, to try not to keep things too serious or he was going to tumble head over heels in love.
Pff. Yeah, sure, as if he wasn't already. Could he tumble further?
He came over to Kurt and hesitated to hug him, not wanting to breach any of the rules he and Kurt had set up before. The 'just friends who can text once in a while' rules. "It's good to see you. Don't know why you worried, you look amazing. As always."
"Uh-huh. Puh-lease, Blaine. I look like a forgotten extra and I smell like Finn's gym bag. And while that may have once upon a time sounded like fantasy fodder for a much younger, infinitely dumber me, it is now feeling quite vile." Kurt was not about to think any better of his current state just because Blaine was either in too much shock or, worse, love, to recognise the truth.
Still, ultimately he took that step closer and he pulled Blaine into a hug, hand in his indeed very fluffy hair, holding him as tightly as he could. "I was so scared..."
"Same. I -- I was scared I'd never see you again." Blaine held on tight to Kurt and no, he didn't care if he kind of smelled like his brother, he still could smell Kurt under all the horrible axe spray. He rested his head on Kurt's shoulder and wondered why he couldn't just stay in this moment forever. He wanted Kurt - no one else. He was tired of pretending life felt good when he wasn't there.
It just breached the barrier and his eyes welled as he started to tremble against him. "I could have died without-- I missed you so much. I'm sorry, I am." To die without Kurt's love was the most horrible thought. He didn't want to lose him so finitely.
"I know. I know." And he had almost called him 'baby' just then, only just managing to bite his tongue on it. This was going to be so hard. He kept his arms around Blaine, especially as he could feel him tremble. He could hear the tears in his voice even without seeing his face. "I wasn't going to let that happen, all right? And you are safe now. Like I said."
And hopefully he would one day be able to get over those minutes when he kept imagining his Blaine shot. Bleeding out somewhere while he couldn't be with him. "All right. Let's try pulling ourselves together, shall we? We can go to my room. Watch something not straight. They care too much about modes of transport. Eludes me."
"Yeah." Blaine pulled back and rubbed at his face, trying to get his shit together so he wasn't just a weird, crying mess. He wanted to convince Kurt he was worth being with and being that much of a baby about things probably wasn't really helping. "Let's go up. I could use a break from different balding guys with beards and their vehicles."
Not that Burt hadn't been nice but he had a very specific taste in TV and Blaine found it fascinating. "I'm so tired but I shouldn't sleep. My mom will see her phone soon and I can't miss that call." He already texted her but he didn't want to cause her any built or bad feelings.
"Just make sure your phone is off silent mode and on vibrate. Then I can hear it and I promise to wake you up." Seemed like the most practical approach. "You have to give your body and mind some rest, there's a lot to process."
Kurt headed down the stairs ahead of Blaine, his hand feeling strangely empty. He had gone down here with Blaine plenty of times. Usually they'd be holding hands. "It feels strange to be here. I had my day planned in New York and I never go anywhere without packing first. I hope I still have enough products here or my night-time routine is a write-off."
"Maybe you can bribe Finn to drive to the 24 hour walmart. It's not what you need but it's what you can get. I was halfway tempted to pay him for a hairgel run. This is just a tragedy." Blaine gestured to his hair, untamed and chaotic. He saw how Burt looked at him - utter shock. "Your dad asked where my parents were from. I think he's trying to work out this whole thing."
He gestured vaguely to himself and his hair as he finally got into Kurt's bedroom. It was nice to be back - smelled good too. He wished he could have stayed in here and waited for Kurt, alone and just feeling his presence and smelling his-- oh, that was creepy even in his head. "Sorry I disrupted your day. I hope I haven't screwed up too much of your week now."
"Come on, Blaine! You have to stop apologising for existing. For things outside your control and, worse, things that need no apology." Kurt turned around and put his hands on Blaine's shoulders. "First of all, you did nothing wrong today. I decided to come here because I couldn't not. Those absolute monsters are the ones to blame. And nothing I was doing today even matters. Not compared to-- You know."
To being here with Blaine. To knowing that he was safe. He looked into Blaine's eyes and sighed. "Your hair is beautiful like this. It suits you. I mean it. Don't apologise when there is no apology needed. Deal?"
"Okay, okay, fine. I'll stop apologising. And in the spirit of that, I won't even say sorry that while looking for hair gel, I found a muscle mag that we really have to talk about later." Cause damn, those guys were hot and was that how Kurt looked at porn cause that was so fun. He smiled at Kurt, playful but nervous. It was just a lot of uncertainty and he knew he was the bad one, the one in the wrong, and he just didn't want to risk rocking the boat too hard.
He was still hoping to win him back. Latest when he graduated. "You really like my hair?" Blaine knew he was harping on about it but he was just impressed Kurt liked it. "Sweet."
"Yes, I really do like it. Look, I am not going to stand here and pretend that I am averse to hair products when I know how much I use in a month. However, your curls are beautiful. They deserve their chance to shine." Kurt looked at him and reached up, his fingers getting into those curls just a little bit. So much nicer to touch than Blaine's hair when it was gelled down. "The racist, colonial, bigoted views that made you ashamed of your natural beauty need to be challenged. Trust me. I'd never lie about my hair opinions."
He took those things very seriously. "...as for the muscle mag, that was probably one of the ones I got from April Rhodes. You should see the full selection, my friend."
"Tomorrow, I'm gonna browse. Right now, I'm gonna sleep. Should I take the floor or-- whatever, I don't mind." He didn't want to assume he could sleep in his bed. That seemed a little too forward. He pulled off his sweater and unbuttoned a few buttons on his shirt, ready to just lie down and wait for the inevitable night time interruption.
Kurt's eyes trailed down when Blaine started unbuttoning the shirt. Damn. It was bad enough seeing Blaine at all, let alone seeing Blaine in his clothes and now seeing Blaine taking off his clothes. So intimate, so very arousing and so not at all appropriate, given the circumstances.
He ended up swallowing and shaking his head, wildly gesticulating to the bed. "Just lie down, okay? I've got to shower and change and then I'll join."
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choirroom2025-01-19 08:24 pm
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He was dressed in black leggings, a skin-tight, long-sleeved blue shirt and sneakers. Practice outfit. He had been at dance practice when this had started and here he was now. Red-rimmed eyes and still in crisis mode.
"Thanks for picking me up. Finn, please tell me you have deodorant? Even whatever macho axe bodyspray you have would be useful at this junction."
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Doing his seatbelt back up, he reversed from his spot and moved towards the gate, glad that Kurt had come because he had no idea what he was supposed to do.
"I knew the guy. One of the guys. It's crazy, he was on the football team. He seemed normal." He had no idea how to wrap his mind around that. Sure, he was a loser but he never wanted to take it out on others. "I'm glad no one died, it could have been worse."
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"I mean, I kind of knew them both. But from the normal getting called names and being bullied stuff. I never talked to them." Normal, as Finn had said. "Do you know how Miss Beiste is doing?"
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Turns out nearly dying put Will in a forgiving mood.
"Will told me the kids in the choir room helped with the bleeding, especially Blaine and Sam. I'm so proud of them all." They survived, they kept each other safe and no one acted rash or stupid. "I hope they'll all go back to school soon or we'll have to just miss regionals. It is what it is, you know?"
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He remembered it all too well. Maybe Blaine should go back to Dalton. Or maybe he was being a coward even thinking like that while Blaine needed him to be a hero. "I'm glad Mr Schuester and you hugged it out. I-- I've no idea what I'm doing. Why I'm even here."
It was just all he could think to do. All he had wanted was to hold Blaine and make sure he was safe.
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It was the only place he felt happy, he couldn't let those assholes win.
"Besides, it's Blaine. I know if there was a shooting at NYADA or Yale, I'd run to the airport. You know?" Finn huffed out an awkward laugh and turned into the main road. "Doesn't matter if you're into each other or not or whatever. That's someone you loved. Still love."
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"I do still love Blaine. I'll always... I just can't be with him. It's not good for him." He had to be the mature one. He had to insist they were over. "I want to keep him safe."
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That's why Will had showed him and him, Emma and Bieste had stood there, trying to work out what it was and what to do. In the end - nothing. Creativity was free and creepy.
"Maybe you're doing the smart thing ..."
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It was so self-destructive. "Although I can say all that and when I'm there with him in person, especially after today? I've no idea how to handle it." He closed his eyes for a moment, then sighed. "Thank you for beating up Brody. I always felt he was homophobic, you know? Or maybe I just disliked him. Misogynist Ken doll."
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"Thanks for the pep talk last week. I got accepted into the teacher course. Me and Puck have our own room on campus." And Finn was so excited to get his degree and start his job. "It's really cool already."
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"Congratulations! I knew you'd get in. Now you have to promise to tell me in case you have any trouble, I don't want to have to end up coaching someone who is flunking while we should be preparing for Nationals again."
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"You should tell Burt we'll be back soon, I'll have to swap our cars around so he should leave his keys by the door." And hopefully while he did that, Kurt would have some time with Blaine. The two of them definitely needed it. "Maybe mom is home, she can put something calming on TV. Like... flower shows or something."
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Why had he never stopped being endeared by his idiocy? He pulled back, cleared his throat and undid his seatbelt. "How do I loo-- You know what? Don't answer that." He did a few quick vocal exercises and then got out of the car, walking straight-backed and purposeful to the house.
He knocked and then used his keys, walking inside. "Hello, hello."
"Hey, son." Burt hugged him quickly, already headed for the door. "I'll swap the cars around with Finn." Ever practical, he was on his way, leaving Kurt alone with Blaine.
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Pff. Yeah, sure, as if he wasn't already. Could he tumble further?
He came over to Kurt and hesitated to hug him, not wanting to breach any of the rules he and Kurt had set up before. The 'just friends who can text once in a while' rules. "It's good to see you. Don't know why you worried, you look amazing. As always."
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Still, ultimately he took that step closer and he pulled Blaine into a hug, hand in his indeed very fluffy hair, holding him as tightly as he could. "I was so scared..."
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It just breached the barrier and his eyes welled as he started to tremble against him. "I could have died without-- I missed you so much. I'm sorry, I am." To die without Kurt's love was the most horrible thought. He didn't want to lose him so finitely.
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And hopefully he would one day be able to get over those minutes when he kept imagining his Blaine shot. Bleeding out somewhere while he couldn't be with him. "All right. Let's try pulling ourselves together, shall we? We can go to my room. Watch something not straight. They care too much about modes of transport. Eludes me."
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Not that Burt hadn't been nice but he had a very specific taste in TV and Blaine found it fascinating. "I'm so tired but I shouldn't sleep. My mom will see her phone soon and I can't miss that call." He already texted her but he didn't want to cause her any built or bad feelings.
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Kurt headed down the stairs ahead of Blaine, his hand feeling strangely empty. He had gone down here with Blaine plenty of times. Usually they'd be holding hands. "It feels strange to be here. I had my day planned in New York and I never go anywhere without packing first. I hope I still have enough products here or my night-time routine is a write-off."
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He gestured vaguely to himself and his hair as he finally got into Kurt's bedroom. It was nice to be back - smelled good too. He wished he could have stayed in here and waited for Kurt, alone and just feeling his presence and smelling his-- oh, that was creepy even in his head. "Sorry I disrupted your day. I hope I haven't screwed up too much of your week now."
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To being here with Blaine. To knowing that he was safe. He looked into Blaine's eyes and sighed. "Your hair is beautiful like this. It suits you. I mean it. Don't apologise when there is no apology needed. Deal?"
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He was still hoping to win him back. Latest when he graduated. "You really like my hair?" Blaine knew he was harping on about it but he was just impressed Kurt liked it. "Sweet."
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He took those things very seriously. "...as for the muscle mag, that was probably one of the ones I got from April Rhodes. You should see the full selection, my friend."
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God, he wanted this day to be over already.
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He ended up swallowing and shaking his head, wildly gesticulating to the bed. "Just lie down, okay? I've got to shower and change and then I'll join."
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