"If it helps, I've learned that you could turn up dressed as anything and I'd still be seriously into you." Blaine smiled sadly, pocketing Kurt's phone and making sure he stuck close to Kurt. He knew the other would want to compose himself before his dad came back so he had to be a rock and help him. "I'm just honoured that even as the cheating asshole, I get to come here and keep you safe. Try to help."
He might not have been the best boyfriend but he wanted to always be there for Kurt, no matter what. "I haven't told anyone. Have you?"
"I couldn't. I mean. Rachel is at her callback right now." How could he tell her? How could he not tell her? He pretty much was the worst friend ever either way. "I told Puck to talk to Quinn because he looked so lost. And I think dad told Mr Schuester."
He thought his dad had said something like that to him, but his focus was shot, quite frankly. He reached up and ran a hand along the side of Blaine's face, trying to find the right words now. Or any useful words. "If he leaves us alone, how can I be enough of a son for them both? I'm not even enough of a son for what my dad always wanted. Finn is that!"
"Okay, don't spiral. Look, we don't know what the future holds and even if the worst happens, you know that your dad loves you and Carol adores you." He raised his hand, gently stroking Kurt's hair but trying not to mess it up. He watched the doctors move back and forth through the halls, just wishing one of them would bring some good news.
"I'm sorry this happened. It's not fair." It wasn't fair to Kurt, Finn or their parents. It was awful. He wanted to make it better but a song and dance wouldn't end the pain. "I get that, I do, but I'm going to be here for you. Every single step."
"In my head I wanted to tell Dave. Karofsky, you know? In my head somehow if he knows then Finn pulls through. Because Dave pulled through. And Dave told me that he is glad he pulled through." Because what if Finn woke up and wished he wouldn't? Kurt shook his head, looking at Blaine and smiling in a sad way, because what else could he do?
"I think if it wasn't for Finn, I might have never dared to come out of the closet. Not back then at least. Maybe I would have been bullied less and maybe I'd have never met you. I don't know. Everything would be different without Finn. Everything would be worse."
"He's a great guy. A great brother. I know he cares about you a lot. He talked to me about you. He gave me such a big brother lecture after I cheated. Then told me to teach him how to dance." Blaine laughed, smiling despite how horrible this reality was. He wanted to cry but how could he? No, he had to be strong and keep it together for Kurt. It was Kurt that was suffering here.
"Finn is one of a kind. He had a lot to lose and he was willing to lose it for you guys. You mean the world to him." And in some ways, he felt that was the problem. Finn missed life as it had been. Adapting to adult like was clearly hard for him.
"He always does that. Calls me little brother and all that. In my head, sometimes, he is tiny. i knew he needed me, I just didn't-- I didn't want to take the time. Make the effort." He should have told him to come visit them in New York. He should have taken the time to call him.
Kurt leaned forward and kissed Blaine's cheek, before resting his head on his shoulder. "I-- We need to have a talk. You and me. At some point. When there isn't a life or death situation."
"Is that even possible at this point? It keeps getting worse and worse. We'll be meeting in the end days next." Blaine teased playfully, wondering if they'd ever actually have a chance to talk without everything being overridden by tragedy and trauma. It was perhaps the worst year of his life for so many reasons.
But it was memorable. "We'll talk. After. For now, we focus on Finn." Adn with that, he took Kurt's hand and held it tight.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
warblainer) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
choirroom2025-01-19 08:24 pm
no subject
He might not have been the best boyfriend but he wanted to always be there for Kurt, no matter what. "I haven't told anyone. Have you?"
no subject
He thought his dad had said something like that to him, but his focus was shot, quite frankly. He reached up and ran a hand along the side of Blaine's face, trying to find the right words now. Or any useful words. "If he leaves us alone, how can I be enough of a son for them both? I'm not even enough of a son for what my dad always wanted. Finn is that!"
no subject
"I'm sorry this happened. It's not fair." It wasn't fair to Kurt, Finn or their parents. It was awful. He wanted to make it better but a song and dance wouldn't end the pain. "I get that, I do, but I'm going to be here for you. Every single step."
no subject
"I think if it wasn't for Finn, I might have never dared to come out of the closet. Not back then at least. Maybe I would have been bullied less and maybe I'd have never met you. I don't know. Everything would be different without Finn. Everything would be worse."
no subject
"Finn is one of a kind. He had a lot to lose and he was willing to lose it for you guys. You mean the world to him." And in some ways, he felt that was the problem. Finn missed life as it had been. Adapting to adult like was clearly hard for him.
no subject
Kurt leaned forward and kissed Blaine's cheek, before resting his head on his shoulder. "I-- We need to have a talk. You and me. At some point. When there isn't a life or death situation."
no subject
But it was memorable. "We'll talk. After. For now, we focus on Finn." Adn with that, he took Kurt's hand and held it tight.